Dear Single Sis...

Well here it is that time again... February 14th is here and you're still single. I know you're wondering "what is wrong with me? what did I do? Why don't I have a Valentine?" Listen girl, I know how you feel. Hear me out, I have been there. I thought the same thing. It seems everyone around you has someone but you. Just so you know you're talking to a young sister who is not engaged, married nor seeing anyone. I am single but not miserable! So I know you're thinking "How do you overcome this misery of always being alone on Valentines Day?"

Dear Single Sis

If you send yourself some flowers and say it's from "bae" (that's what they call it now days)  no matter how you fool everyone else you know it does not have the same effect. Don't get yourself all depressed and cry all day for one day. Valentines day is like Father's day, a day to celebrate fathers. Do you do go and cry because you're not a father? I didn't think so. 

How's Your Relationship with Christ?

Before you continue to read I want you to know that this is a Christian Blog. If you have not committed your life to Christ I suggest you do. It is the best decision you can ever make. Before you say, "I have time that's old people stuff..." Well death is striking at all ages so that's not a good excuse. If you were saved once and maybe drifted away... You didn't drift so far away that you can't come back. Say this salvation prayer aloud: "Dear God,
I come to You in the Name of Jesus. I admit that I am not right with You, and I want to be right with You. I ask You to forgive me of all my sins. The Bible says if I confess with my mouth that “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in my heart that God raised Him from the dead, I will be saved (Rom. 10:9). I believe with my heart and I confess with my mouth that Jesus is the Lord and Savior of my life. Thank You for saving me!
In Jesus’ Name I pray. Amen."

Dear single sis...

 I know the feeling of being lonely, feeling incomplete, empty and like no one wants you... sis trust me, you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) I heard this analogy some where "A diamond does not stop being a diamond because no one recognizes it's value. They shine even brighter. They stay there until the right person comes along who sees their value and invests in their sparkle. So shine bright!" Just because you're single doesn't mean you should start doubting your worth. Single does not mean you are ugly and it definitely does not mean no one wants you. You're listening to someone who is living it

Dear Single Sis 

The hardest pill we have to swallow is that God is in control. He plans our lives. He is in control of it period. God does things we just don't understand but some how it all works together for our good and his glory according to Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.
 and Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. so you have to trust that he knows what he is doing. That sounds to me like God has promised you a great future. He may not make everything comfortable according to what you desire but it is clear that he won't harm you. God has great plans for your life Sis. You don't see it right now but he does. but if you don't hold on you will forfeit God's plan. As a type I prophesy Greater into your life in the Name of Jesus. The future glory of this Temple will be greater than its past glory, says the LORD of Heaven's Armies. And in this place I will bring peace. I, the LORD of Heaven's Armies, have spoken!" (Haggai 2:9) also see Job 8:7

Dear Single Sis...

Pull yourself together. Don't even think about compromising your integrity or even going back to that ex. If he was not good for you then he is not good for you now. Since I am already there I want you to know that any man that does not respect your body is not the one. If he is touching all on you and you have to tell him to stop then I will be honest with you, he is not the one. If he keeps leading you to sin. He is not the one. anyone who leads you to sin does not love you. Many women are mistreated 364 days a year and somewhere some not so smart sister is taking some cheating, lying, lazy joker back all because he bought her a bear and some chocolate. 
Shall I proceed? If you're keeping up with him on social media...you're not over him! Forgive him and move on with your life. Now Forgive him doesn't mean going back to him and hitting him up! There is a difference in being Forgiving and Foolish! Be like Paul No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, (Philippians 3:13 NLT)  

Soooo. What do you do?

Dear Single Sis, if you are single and you find it uncomfortable go to God in prayer. There is nothing too small or too big for him Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. "Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done." (Philippians 4:6) Tell him how you feel. Many times we tell God about everything else but the truth. We give God deep devotional prayers without telling him the truth. There is nothing wrong with Saying "God I feel a little down because..." Yes God is Holy. Yes he is our father, but he is also our friend.  "I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn't confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told me." (John 15:15) 

Dear Single Sis Don't find yourself complaining, there is something worse than being single on Valentines day like marrying the wrong person or getting a divorce. God is looking out for you whether you know it or not

Dear Single Sis so what do you do? ah good question! You Don't have to spend your Valentine's Day alone crying and watching lifetime movies nor do you have to stroll social media all night. Everywhere you go you are gonna see couples, but don't allow that to make you bitter. If you have great friends who are single or at least one friend, spend some time with them. Go hang out! Go to a comedy show, watch a movie, have a party, try some new recipes, or play some games! If you don't have any good saved friends that can you can hang with Hang with God! God? I can't see him that sounds so corny... I Know... I know as lame as it sounds...Try it! lay out before God, pray, and study your word! Let him speak to you. There is nothing wrong with laying out before God. A lot of married women always tell how they wish they could have taken advantage of just being in the presence of God when they were single. Do Something sis! You and your girls should encourage each other! As corny as this stuff sounds if you try it you won't regret it. Valentine's Day is about celebrating love in general, be around those you love. 

I pray that this blog has been a blessing to you. Single sisters, pray for me as I pray for you. Out of the many things I have to do God put you on my heart and inspired me to write this blog just for you! I love you so much. You are awesome you are beautiful! honey you are more than a conqueror even when you don't feel like it. I am praying for you! 

Connect with me on social media: I'm on Twitter @KBSpeaks_ and Instagram @KBSpeaks_ 

Share this blog with another sister! I pray that it is a blessing to you and others. Feel free to comment if you like. I would love to hear your feedback. You are my SISTER! I looooveee you! sis there is so much destiny and purpose on your life and you don't even recognize it... You are a blessed woman! Just because you don't FEEL something doesn't mean it does not exist...Let me stop typing now before I make my own self happy! LOL!  

To Be or Not to be is the question (For Singles)

This blog is to help with these burning questions "Why am I single?" "What should I do?" "Everyone around me is "taken" except me" "I am lonely" This blog will feature quotes from Entrepreneur, life coach, motivational speaker, author, and my brother in Christ. Tony Gaskins I recommend all ladies and gents purchase his book Single is not a curse.  Also guys purchase The Guy code by Tony Gaskins. Ladies can purchase Mrs. Right also by Tony Gaskins and While I wait I'm going to Serve by my sister in Christ, and author; The renowned Evangelist Bridgette Y. Wright

 

Get Rid of the Ex (if there is one)

Why would Kaybee say get rid of the ex in a singles blog post? welp, glad you asked. Many times we are classified as single but we still have that "ex" lingering around. "X" him or her out of your life. Stop entertaining phone calls, those I Miss you texts, stop looking on their Facebook profile block them on twitter or instagram. The main reason we continue to follow that person on social media is to see if he or she has someone else or to make those subliminal messages you hope he or she sees.You don't need to see a thing

.

Move forward, don't be distracted. Maybe you say "Well we can be friends" not such a good idea... "we can just be friends" usually means you can be mine without the title. If you dated a person that wasn't loyal and wasn't a good "boy friend/girl friend" what makes you think they are a good friend they have already proved to you that they are not. If you have children by them then you are excused! However just make sure that your reason of contact is for your child's benefit.

 

 If not and for my non parents...What happens then is that this person is still apart of your life lingering around. Be mindful that some times it is the people who you are connected to that prevent you from being able to go to the next level. Take Abraham (Abram) and Lot for example. He was instructed in Gen 12:1-4 to leave his family however Lot (his nephew) went with him. Please understand everyone cannot handle the altitude in which God is taking you to. We see that God shows Abram something only AFTER he and Lot separate in Genesis 13:14.  If you want to be prepared for your next get rid of that ex... sounds catchy I know I know.. lol (I am very witty as you can tell)

sooooooooo.....
 

Block him/her on social media, unfriend, unfollow, whatever you have to do.. stop responding to those text messages, phone calls, no don't even face time, oovoo, kik,... nothing! If you know he or she will be some where and if you can avoid it.. do so! AND I beseech you to stop shacking up if you are. Let's keep it real are those 10,15,20 minutes worth ETERNITY in hell? I didn't think so.. An ungodly soul tie can form if it already hasn't. Then you will really find yourself "in a pickle" if it already has pray that God breaks that soul tie. We can be tied to someone through channels such as emotions and sex. Don't give anyone freebies! and if you ask God to break that ungodly soul tie and you find yourself disinterested in that person now, then it was a soul tie that kept you there. Seriously, Stop wasting time, Time delayed is destiny delayed!

Alone: bad or good?

 

 

 

Well, why are you alone is the question. Are you alone because you refuse to settle or are you alone because you ran every one you ever had away? LOL (you can laugh) however it is the harsh reality. If you refuse to settle good deal.. but make sure your standards aren't higher than you are. We females are big about "he got to have a Mercedes he got to love the Lord" well sistah you drive a 1999 Honda and you don't obey God. okay! get it? on the other hand....Some people wonder why they are alone but they mistreat everyone they get involved with. Example: I have an ex who wondered why he was single so many years. Well, when I got into a relationship with him I understood why. He never had time for me. I would go days and weeks without talking to him. When I desired time and attention from him he acted like giving me 5 minutes of time would kill him.

                I understood he was in ministry I understood he was busy but I should not had to wonder if I was single or if I was not. I didn't even know if I had done something wrong to him, because he never wanted to communicate with me. Listen People make time for what is really important to them! Every season of your life that may not be comfortable is there to reveal to you something about you! You may find that you have low self esteem, maybe you're selfish, maybe you should spend time with God more, maybe you should depend on others less. None of us are perfect but if you can change something, change it. When the disciples were on the boat during a storm we find that Jesus was asleep and the disciples were "freaking out" When they woke Jesus up he asked why were they so fearful. That Storm revealed to them they had little faith. (Mark 4:35-41) It's okay to be alone. Enjoy life, Most importantly enjoy God! 

Everyone around me is in a relationship! :-( 

 

 

Were you one of those people who were "salty" on Valentine's Day? V-Day for some people was the only day they felt appreciated. Sad...but true. and Any one who looks forward to V-Day is apparently not in a good relationship because if a person is in a good relationship they will feel loved and appreciated all the time and God forbid these poor sisters who get cheated on year round but post pics of the only $20 "dude" ever spent on her.. bless her heart

 

I know the feeling... seems like as soon as you're single the more people you see together. If you don't watch it you will become angry and even jealous. That's so easy to do however. Everyone that is with someone now may not be in the God ordained relationship that God has for them, also they may not even be happy in that relationship! Social media and smiles can fool you! Things may appear to be something it is not...

 Especially those of you who are young in the teens and early twenties...Honey Chile, LIVE! okay very few from high school and college marry and let alone stay together. Some people are prolonging destiny! Don't want a relationship more than you want GOD! Don't! Tony Gaskins says it like this "If you are not happy Single you are not ready for a relationship" He's right! Some people are in discontentment so they join to someone else. They have to be with someone jumping from relationship to relationship! Because they are simply trying to get what they do not possess themselves from someone else. Some people are so busy trying to be power couples they forget they have power by themselves. (Luke 10:19) No relationship is to complete you but to compliment you! What do you have to compliment?

 

The bible declares that "What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder" Mark 10:9 Let's be real some people God hasn't joined together. They think that but truth is he didn't. You can  both be saved, sanctified and fire baptized and still not be meant to be. Uh Oh! When God created Eve her purpose existed before she did. God doesn't join or form things without a purpose. (see Genesis chapter 1 and Chapter 2) I believe all married couples can sympathize with me when I say Marriage is ministry. God created us to be more than just husbands and wives. He created us to do more than please another person and please ourselves.

Since I am single, what should I do?

 

 

Well as Tony Gaskins explains in his book Single is not a curse "Single is time for the Five F's Freedom, Focus, Family, Finances, and Friends" (p24-30) Single life is the time to do other things not sit around wishing and wanting. BE Content with you and GOD! The Apostle Paul wished that we would want to be single because that way we can devote our time to God. (1Corinthians 7:25-40) Pleasing God will then be our only focus. Not trying to please God and someone else. Enjoy your life! If you don't enjoy your own life what makes you think that someone will enjoy life with you.

 

Stop trying to plan your life you will only delay destiny! God delivered the Israelites from Egypt but because of their whining, mumbling, and disobedience after all that God had done for them they stayed in the wilderness 40 years. (Joshua 5:6) Delaying the blessing...delaying the promise! The bible declares that "The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to usward, not willing that any should perish but all come to repentance." (2 Peter 3:9)

 

 So many times we plan our lives "I will be married by 26 expecting a child 6 months later, my biological clock is ticking and I'm only 20 LOL" please stop, okay! You can't plan your life. God planned it (Jeremiah 29:11) (Proverbs 3:5-6) Nothing you go through surprises him! Don't try to wait until you are 40, 50, or 60 years old to try to walk out your purpose. There are some things God wants to bless you with in your NOW season. Do it now! Your purpose is not attached to any mate, it is attached to God! (Genesis 2:5-7) Do you not believe that God can bring you someone better?

 

SLOW YOUR ROLL.........

 

There are people right now that are wedded wishing they weren't, there are some people on the verge of being wedded and in relationships that GOD has not said get into. They are in them because they feel it's right and they been dating Ray Ray or Keisha 10 years and so  they believe that's the one.. Some feel he/she is saved so that's the one.. nope not always so. Don't make decisions like that without first hearing The Lord. Don't lower your standards but also; Don't expect a 100% perfect person. Use this time to get closer to God and prepare for the one God has for you. You should feel privileged that you're not going through a maze, (say it with me) delaying destiny! It is better to be single and happy than together and tormented! It is better to be alone and walking in your purpose than to be with someone and outside The Will of God. A lot of people desire to have weddings and not godly marriages. If you cling to God and fulfill your purpose (if you don't know ask him what it is) you will be ready for the one God has for you as Tony Gaskins says "You attract what you are not what you want". Do the biblical math 1+1 will = 1 not a half and a forth will equal 1. so many times we think we are whole and we are not! (Proverbs 14:2)

 

Keep in Mind....

"The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever; Do not forsake the works of your hands" Psalm 138:8

 

"And we know that all things work together for the good of those who love God, to

those who are the called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

 

"But may the God of all Grace, who called us into his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you" 2 Peter 5:10

 

 

 I pray that this blesses you! comment, share with a friend, you're free to post it to your social media pages as well! I would love your feedback! This is due to the glory of God!

 

You are not your past! New Mindset! New you! now that is bible!

 

 

 

Blessings, Kaybee 

 

Connect With The Author of This Blog



 

 Follow on Twitter @imkiarab 

 

 

 

Heartaches worse than headaches?

Help: My heart is broken!!!

This post is for those of you who are trying to figure out how to get yourself together. Maybe you gave yourself to someone totally and completely with hopes of continuing life with them. Maybe you even gave yourself to that person to a point you would bend just to make sure they were happy. Maybe it was your body, your money, your morals. Then they stomped all over your heart! right? days, months, years .. wasted! right. I know the thoughts of "God why didn't this work?" "I really loved him (or her)."  I know you may feel hurt or betrayed. You've probably cried (if you're sensitive like me) well, did you honor God in that relationship? Did you follow God's plan or your own emotions? Did you ignore warning signs about this person?

Let's address it and get up 

Even if you did it's okay. you live and you learn. Be real with God and tell him what you've done that was wrong. The bible declares "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness" 1John1:9  "People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy" Proverbs 28:13 Repentance is a change in mindset. Repent and get up! Sounds easy right? I know I know what you're thinking. It's not that easy. yea yea. you can't beat yourself up. God saw you, he knew what would happen before it happened. God doesn't have a sharpie documenting you on a board with tally marks. I know you're hurt but get this What's in the will of God for your life can't leave you.

so now that we've addressed what's not.. you're one step closer to what is... 

Before you do anything.. forgive that person. no I don't know what he or she did to you, but forgive them, it is not for them but for you. Pray for them. Release them via prayer. now you're ready for God to work on you.. go ahead..  Cry and scream to God if you wish.. get every emotion out quickly! Ask yourself, what reason would God allow you to go through this? self evaluate. Was it your disobedience? Was it to humble you? Have you treated someone that way before? Did you put that person before God?.... Don't be discouraged you still have purpose. Pray and seek what is in the will of God for you. I love the old song that says "Have thine own way" Ask God to lead you into making the steps he wants for you. Yes you're gonna hurt for a little while. The more you pray the more you'll be elevated to see a little bit more of God's plan for you... Don't be isolated and neglect the place of prayer. A trick of Satan is to convince you to stay away from prayer and stay away from God. Satan does that so he can have his way with you while you're emotionally unstable. You may be in the lowest place of your life that you have ever been in... the lowest of lows. My favorite story in the bible is about Jonah. We know that God tells Jonah to go one place and but Jonah decides to get on a boat and go to another place.guess what..He causes a storm. He had to admit to the sailors that he caused that storm then he ends up being thrown over and swallowed by a whale. but in the belly of the whale Jonah cried out to God. I know in the belly of the whale! the lowest of lows right?  you too can cry out.

Look There are many of men and women out there. You never know which one God has for you. So get busy get back up and get on the path God has for you. (Jeremiah 29:11) Sometimes it is hard to accept that somethings are and somethings are not in the plan of God for our lives. Take a minute to experience God's grace. Begin a journal, write those feelings down. Don't continue to chase that person who broke your heart!! Don't! You are a child of God you are royalty. recognize your worth! (Listen.. When God gives something to you don't have to make yourself vulnerable to get it. When you go grocery shopping you go in a store and you buy it right? you don't let it sit there in the store when you know you are supposed to have it) If you have done all these things in the previous paragraphs guess what you've done?? you moved on just that quick!! You have moved on!!!

 You went to the right place to get your heart fixed. You went to the heart fixer. Psalms 147:3 declares "He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds" Instead of trying to jump into another relationship to fix your heart Go to God. He will mend your heart. When you go to someone else quickly you can really hurt yourself. Your expectations would cause you to be disappointed. Don't even dwell on this past get up. The things in the relationship that were revealed to you, you should work on them because you still have a future. Most importantly get busy serving God. Do the things he has revealed to you to do. Thank God for the experience and keep truckin' (1 Thesalonians 5:18) "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee." Isaiah 26:3. Look, I know telling you to focus on God sounds a bit cliché but try it and see what happens. Try a few things to make yourself happy but that's not outside of God's will, don't go slashing tires now lol, instead do somethings you've never done that you've always wanted to do. Workout, go shopping, cut your hair, change your hair color, start a blog (lol). Do something different.no, do not make emotional decisions but do something you have wanted to do. do something for you! I am not posting this from something I've watched on tv or heard but from experience.

This is my very first post. so follow me on twitter @imkiarab and let me know what you think of this post. feel free to comment and share it with others. This heartbreak only bruised you it didn't tear you up. The good thing about bruises is that you can look back at your bruises and remember how you got them. "And they overcame him by the blood of the lamb, and by the word of their testimony, and they loved not their lives unto the death" Revelation 12:11 It may feel embarrassing but tell your testimony when you're led by the spirit.

Trust me someone needs it.  I pray that this blesses you!

You are not your past! New Mindset! New you! now that is bible!

Blessings,

 Kaybee